You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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