Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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