I wannas sexs uuuuu
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize
