woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
