Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted