i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
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not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
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I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.