Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
