My nipple is on Facebook.
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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