my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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