this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
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