Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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