WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Randomize
