i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
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Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
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My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
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