ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
