is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
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Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
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someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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