I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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