there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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