His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I just want to make out with him forever
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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