Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Rumble strips road head = magical
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize
