I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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