awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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