It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I am spending my child support on dildos
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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