then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
My bed smells like the plague
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
