so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
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He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
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Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
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