Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
