they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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