oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
The struggles of a small town man whore
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
