Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize