is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Randomize
