lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
