Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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