I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize