Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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