Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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