Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
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I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
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Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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