Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
