so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
i believe in u and ur pee
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
