my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
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