so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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