Jerry, you need to find god
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe in your delicious
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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