he wants to bone in the snuggie
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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