i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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