lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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