my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
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What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
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What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night