beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.