before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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