Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
