Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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