Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
