do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Randomize
