everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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