Who did Billy Mays play for?
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
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